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User : The More Proactive Gibbon Masher - Get the hell off our internet

On Sunday June 4th, 9:27am
The More Proactive Gibbon Masher wrote :
People actually eat this...

It is a volcano-shaped pile of raw meat, with a raw egg on top. It's called steak tartar and is considered to be a delicacy.

I would lick the sweaty, grimey palm of a homeless alcoholic bum before you ever got me to eat this.

Get the hell off our internet.

On Thursday June 1st, 9:26am
The More Proactive Gibbon Masher wrote :
The order.

["Server"] - May I take your order, sir?

["Customer"] - Yes, I would like a 6 oz portion of boneless, skinless chicken-breast, delivered at post-cooked demensions of 2 inches by 3 inches by 1 1/2 inches. The chicken must arrive with precicely 3 grill marks on the top size which run horizontally, and 2 grill marks on the bottom, which run perfectly perpendicular to the grill marks on the top side. A tolerance of +/- 2 degrees for the grill mark offsets is acceptable.

["Customer"] - I would like 168 grams of creamy cole slaw, formed into the shape of a Fleur de Lys and garnished with 3 equally-sized sprigs of fresh organic parsley. On a separate plate, I would like 5 sections of carrot, each with a diameter no greater than .5 inches but no less than .35 inches, cut to 1-, 2-, 3-, 4-, and 5-inch lengths respectively, each chilled to an internal temperature of 5.75 degrees Celcius.

["Customer"] - For my drink, I would like Montpellier sparkling water in a 7 1/2 oz tumbler, with exactly 8 ice-cubes measuring .35 cubic inches each. Pour 5 1/2 ounces of the sparkling water into the tumbler, then gently place the ice cubes in the glass. Do not place the ice-cubes in the glass before pouring the drink to ensure that the maximum amount of carbonation is retained. Take care not to drop the ice-cubes into the glass; place them in gently. Please include two bendable straws for sipping, one blue and one green.

["Server"] - So... you want the #6?

["Customer"] - Yes.

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User : Lord Herbert L. Pennysworth Jr. the third, Esquire - Get the hell off our internet

On Wednesday May 31st, 1:20pm
Lord Herbert L. Pennysworth Jr. the third, Esquire wrote :
Sinners repent.

And it burns, burns, burns,
The ring of holy ghost fire.

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On Wednesday May 31st, 1:14pm
Lord Herbert L. Pennysworth Jr. the third, Esquire wrote :
This is the end...

My only friend, the end.

Get the hell off our internet.

On Wednesday May 31st, 11:31am
Ruthl wrote :
Chicken is good for you.

[SERVER] : "Eat it."

[CUSTOMER] : "No."

[SERVER] : "Eat it!!"

[CUSTOMER] : "I can see the bumps on its skin from where the feathers were plucked. No."

Get the hell off our internet.